« spreading cheer | Main | super blow songs »

January 29, 2009

finally, an honest performance review

My first performance review of any kind occurred at EDS, where to my complete horror my ditzy boss engraved the word "exuberant" into my professional epitaph.

"You take that out of my review!"

"No. You're exuberant. There's no other word for it."

"This word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

A few years later, another boss wrote that I need to develop opposable thumbs, as it would likely benefit my productivity. When I didn't respond to this jab, he deduced a truth that did not please him: I didn't read his review feedback. I skipped to the last page, where the compensation is detailed.

Later, yet another boss wrote that "John is practically perfect in every way," but I know when someone's baiting me, so I didn't protest. Much.

And then there was Monday, when I snapped at Flo, my boss, and pranked Lilly, my understudy, and each—independently and within an hour of one another—called me a "fucking douche."

Things that make you pause and reflect.

posted by john at 08:10 AM  •  permalink